Month: August 2012

Shabbos in Monsey and the Beis Medrification of Our Shuls

Last week, my wife an I had the pleasure of spending Shabbos with our friend Rabbi Label Lam and his family in Monsey. It afforded my the experience of davening in for different places.

On Friday night we davened at Ohr Somayach, the yeshiva for Baalei Teshuva. The new session hasn’t start yet and the huge beautiful Beis Medrash was less than half full. There was a wonderful Baalei Tefillah who’s voice filled the room with a traditional Ashkenaz Kabbalos Shabbos and Maariv.

On Shabbos, morning we davened in a local shul in a house basement which was started over 28 years ago. It’s a small minyan, supplemented this Shabbos by a number of yeshiva boys who were still home. It was nice to see that there was a Dvar Torah delivered. The Shul had tables and most of those there were learning when they weren’t davening.

For Mincha, we went to a local Chassidish Shteible which is about 8 years old. Before Mincha the Shul was packed with men and children learning Torah.

For Maariv we went to a big Ashkenaz Shul furnished with tables and filled with seforim.

What struck me was the tables and the preeminence of learning in all the Shuls. This focus should be of no surprise in Monsey which is a big Yeshivish and Chasidish learning oriented community. But the trend of Beis Medrification is sweeping Shuls all over the United States.

We’ll examine this trend next week and look at both its positive and potential negative effects.

Some Great Shul Experiences in Woodmere

Shul choice varies greatly from location to location. In densely populated areas, one might have the choice of over 25 shuls within a 10 minute radius, while in areas with fewer Jews, the choice may be as few as one or two shuls in the same area. Wherever you are, the experience can be maximized.

I had the pleasure of spending last Shabbos in Woodmere, a relatively affluent Modern Orthodox community in the Five Towns area of Long Island. My friends are members of Aish Kodesh, but in the summer time, when Mora the D’Asra, Rabbi Moshe Weinberger, is out of town and the weather is hot, they often skip the 20 minute walk and daven locally. Locally in this case means minyanim in people’s houses.

On Friday night we walked across the street to a minyan in a neighbor’s house. There were about 25 men in attendance including a number of black hatted yeshivish sons of the residents. The davening made a tremendous impression. It was a well paced, extremely spirited, Carlbach nusach with everybody in attendance participating in the many niggunim (songs). It was quite inspirational and I was informed that every week they daven Carlbach style. Nobody was in a rush, they were there to start their Shabbos on an extremely high note. After davening people shmoozed for 5-10 minutes.

On Shabbos morning we walked 5 minutes along the winding roads of the Woodsburgh section of Woodmere, until we arrived in a Shul situated in greenhouse side room. This Shul, which has been running for 29 years, has a Hashkama minyan at 7:30 am and the regular minyan is at 9:15 am. In the house itself, there is an area for women.

By the end of davening over 60 men had joined us to participate in the second minyan. The Baalei Tefillah and the Baalei Koreh were very good, and the davening ended around 11:15 am, but was most impressive was the decorum and kavod for the tefillah. Dr. Thurm, the homeowner and Gabbai runs the show efficiently as he hands out the kibbudim (the honors), picks the Baalei Tefillah and makes sure the well stocked weekly kiddush is ready on time. There is a membership fee which covers the cost of the non-sponsored kiddush, the heating, the cooling, and other expenses. It was a tremendous Kiddush Hashem and a tribute to Dr. Thurm and the participants.

So although I missed davening at Aish Kodesh and it’s legendary spirited davening, I was treated to two private house minyanim where people are going way beyond convenience and creating minyanim of inspiration and kavod (honor) for tefillah and Shabbos. There is an expression “Grow Where Your Planted” and these places go way beyond that cry providing weekly growth opportunities for those who are planted in the Woodmere domain.

Checklist for Planning a Shul Shabbos Lunch

1) Create a committee or get a few commitments from members to help, especially with set up and clean up.

2) Determine how important it is to keep costs down.

3) Determine how important it is to make the menu fantastic.

4) Estimate expected attendance.

5) Discuss your plans with the appropriate Shul officers.

6) Call caterers that can meet your needs and discuss pricing for varying options.

7) Select caterer and menu and agree on a price.

8) Get the menu and the price in writing from the caterer.

9) Advertise lunch to members. Multiple forms of nudging/communication will be necessary.

10) Make it as easy as possible for members to say they are attending.

11) Have the committee members encourage other members to attend.

12) Use software or keep a spreadsheet of attending members.

13) Create a table layout and seating plan if necessary.

14) Make sure the food is delivered on Friday.

15) Check that everything agreed upon was delivered.

16) Set up the warmers.

17) Prepare the tables before the lunch on Shabbos morning.

18) Plan out the timing of when the courses will be served and any speeches will be given.

19) Keep the timing reasonable.

20) Clean up the room properly after the meal.

21) Give the treasurer the amounts to be billed for the attendees.

Efforts Are Necessary – But There Are No Guarantees

Although there’s certainly a correlation between efforts made on behalf of a Shul event and the results, there are no guarantees that an event will be successful. Your efforts are important nonetheless.

A very recent example comes to mind. In coordinating the ticket ordering for the Siyum HaShas event at Met Life stadium many calls were made and emails sent to the Agudah Siyum headquarters to find out about the seating options. The goal was to clarify what were the benefits of the seats at the varying price levels.

Even after gathering the information, it had to presented to Shul members to try and guide them towards a decision that would make sense for them based on the research and analysis. It seems simple enough, but people have their own understandings of situations and they’ll sometimes ignore information that you think is relevant.

At the end of the day, you can only do so much and people need to make their own decisions. If they make a wrong decision, it’s important, albeit sometimes difficult, to refrain from saying “I told you so”. The goal is to help others be right, and if they end up on the wrong side of the decision, your job is to console and not criticize.

Even if your information and analysis is solid, there are always factors beyond your control which may effect the success of the event. And sometimes events beyond your control, can put a cherry on top of your efforts. In the case of the Siyum, the cherry was added was that people, at every price range, were by and large very happy with their seats. Part of that was due to the “beyond our control” seating upgrades that we received when the Agudah had to upgrade some seats due to changes in the women’s seating configuration. Even those who spent more for their seats, and who didn’t receive upgrades, were very happy because the expected benefits of those seats clearly materialized.

An added bonus was the rain situation. Before the event started it was raining and many of the blocks of seats purchased were covered, and the people under those coverings were very happy. Once the event started, the rain stopped completed and all 90,000 people greatly appreciated the lack of rain. G-d was surely smiling and saying hello to all of us.

Here’s the summary.
– If you assume responsibility for an event, make the maximum efforts for its success
– Even with maximum efforts, success is not guaranteed
– It’s important to remember that G-d truly holds the keys and is ultimate the source of all success
– It’s nice when things work out well, but community projects are about doing your best to help, regardless of the results.