February 2018 - Shul Politics

Ten Ideas For Purim

Here are Ten Ideas for Purim

1) Spend more on Matanos Levyonim than on Shaloch Manos

2) Give Shaloch Manos to at least one person to whom it will have a friendship impact

3) It’s a day of joy, so don’t get lost in the details

4) If you haven’t hired someone for the task, then help clean up the Shul after the Megillah leining

5) Let your children enjoy their noise toys, but be considerate of your neighbors

6) Consider that some people get a little sick from the smell of the cap guns

7) Try to appreciate the costumes and poems of others

8) If you drink, drink responsibly, be under control

9) Be positive in your joy, focus on increasing your connection to others

10) Improve the quality of your seudah by focusing on Jewish unity and re-acceptance of the Torah

Preserving Shul Sanity on Purim

Purim presents a number of unique issues for a Shul which we’ll try to highlight in this post.

Purim is Like Yom Kippur
The Kaballah masters compare Purim to Yom Kippur. From a Shul’s perspective this is evident in the fact that there are often as many people in Shul on Purim night as there are on Yom Kippur. The presence of more children presents special seating issues and if we want our regular seat we should get there early or find another seat. Although we don’t normally like to split up minyanim, some Shuls make additional minyanim in order to accommodate the overflow crowds.

On Purim night, some Shuls have a party in celebration of Purim and to break the fast of Esther, similar to the break fast that occurs after Yom Kippur. Since the Shul is at capacity, logistics in accommodating the large crowd have to be addressed.

Megillah Readings
Hearing the Megillah is a halachic obligation on men and women, and families with smaller children often need to make two trips to Shul to hear the Megillah. Many Shuls have extra readings of the Megillah. In Kew Gardens Hills, this list contains over 125 readings on Purim day.

Since we need to hear every word of the Megillah, some focus has to be made on restoring quiet after the banging and groggering that occurs every time Haman’s name is mentioned.

Purim Seudah
The Purim Seudah is a wonderful opportunity for the Shul to have a communal meal and is a very popular event in smaller Shuls, where size logistics make it practical. Since many people accompany their Purim Seudah with extra drinking, care has to be made to keep alcohol out of the hands of minors and to make sure adults drink and act responsibly.

Shalach Manos
The mitzvah of Shaloch Manos is an opportunity to show our friendship to our fellow Shul members. This opportunity can also create a problem of overlooking a member and causing a tinge of emotional pain. Some Shuls have Shaloch Manos programs where members can participate in sending group baskets to their fellow members. These programs also have the additional benefit of raising money for the Shul.

It’s All About Unity
The number of activities and the stress they can produce can bring us to the point of conflict. It’s helpful to keep in mind that the mitzvos of the day are focused on Jewish Unity and we should focus on the happiness that Shul unity should bring in its wake.

The Embattled Mi-Shebeirach

It’s a simple prayer, used in a variety of situations. Its goal is to ask Hashem to pour some more beracha (blessing) on the government, on the soldiers, on the sick, on a family member, or a friend. What could be wrong with that? Yet this wonderful prayer meant to invoke goodness and blessing has been in the center of much discussion.

Let’s focus on the Mi-Shebeirach that an Oleh (one called up to the Torah) can say for others. Here’s the Art Scroll translation:
“The One who blessed our forefathers Avraham, Yitzchak and Yaakov, may he bless (names inserted here), that the (name of the Oleh) will contribute charity on their behalf.”

What could be bad? The Shul can raise a little more money, and some more people become the subject of a request for increase blessing. The problem comes in because it’s an “extra” prayer which lengthens the davening. I’m sure many have witnessed a proud grandparent inserting over 20 names of his children and grandchildren, in which case it can lengthen the davening for a minute or two or more. And because the rest of the congregation is not praying during the Mi-Shebeirach, the talking levels tends to increase which takes away from the Shul’s decorum.

These are real issues. Davening is hard. Different people have different levels of Shul stamina. There is an (often unstated) understanding of how long the Shabbos morning davening will take. Lengthening that time can be considered a breach of that understanding. It’s a classic Shul Politics situation!

In the more time-conscious minyanim, the Oleh Mi-Shebeirachs are eliminated altogether. In Shuls where they are made, it’s the Rabbi and Gabbai’s job to maintain and increase sensitivity towards the decorum level during that time. On a personal level, one can pick up a sefer or perhaps say some of the prayers which where skipped.

One last suggestion is that we can think about what is being said and what we are trying to accomplish with the Mi-Shebeirach. Perhaps then we can transform it from a “grin and bear it” to a “smile and embrace it” situation.

Rabbinic Compensation Stats

Yeshiva University’s Center for the Jewish Future commissioned a study to shed some light on Rabbinic Compensation and Benefits. The survey was distributed to some 1,000 rabbis across North America, including those who serve as teachers, chaplains, campus rabbis, and are retired, in addition to those with a current pulpit. A total of 265 rabbis responded, representing a cross-section of Orthodox rabbis across the U.S. and Canada.

Here are some stats from the study:

• The average synagogue in the study employs close to two rabbis, with large synagogues, defined as those with 500 or more member units, employing almost three.

• The average synagogue employs the equivalent of about 1.6 full-time office employees.

• The median 2017 compensation for all rabbis in the survey is $90,000. For senior rabbis, the median is $100,000; associate rabbis $85,000; assistant rabbis $65,000; and campus rabbis $77,000.

• Pay varies significantly by the size of the synagogue. The median compensation for senior rabbis at large synagogues is $200,000, medium size synagogues (200-499 member units) $150,000, and small synagogues is $70,000.

• More than half (52 percent) of the surveyed rabbis do not receive health benefits, although a significant portion of them are covered under their wife’s plan.

• Nearly seven out of 10 rabbis do not receive any life or disability insurance from their synagogue, and only slightly more than 50 percent receive retirement benefits.

• Only about 20 percent live in a synagogue-owned home or apartment, or have a joint arrangement. The vast majority own or rent the residence in which they live.

• Vacation benefits are generous, however, with half of the rabbis receiving four-to-five weeks annually, and 20 percent entitled to six or more weeks.

• About 58 percent have additional employment, with the most common secondary position as a Judaic studies faculty member.

• Rabbis also supplement their income with rabbinic-related activities, such as officiating at lifestyle events, although it is typically a minimal amount; two-thirds make less than $2,500 a year doing so.

• They also typically get reimbursed for certain job-related expenses, such as conferences and professional development, entertaining guests on Shabbat and holidays and cell phone usage.

Sharing the Joy: Your Shul and Your Wedding

The wedding of your children is one of life’s most joyous occasions. It’s a wondrous celebration and you only want to share the joy, but resource limitations force most people to make some hard choices.

Soon after the engagement is announced, the search for a hall begins, requiring an estimated guest count. After tabulating family, neighbors and other must-invites, attention turns to the Shul list and the unenviable selection task. Your closest friends and those you don’t really know are easy decisions, it’s the middle group that’s difficult. If you’ve been invited to a previous simcha, reciprocity should be considered, and for the rest of the members you need to make your choices, and hope those that you couldn’t invite will understand the financial realities behind your decision.

About a month before the simcha, the invitations usually go out. Many of your invitees will not be prompt in their response and then you have to decide if, and whom, you’re going to call for followup. A day or two before the wedding comes the last prep task, seating and creating the table cards. For family, neighbors and some friends, we assigned specific tables, but for the Shul members on the men’s side, we assigned them all to the same table number, let them choose their own seats in that table pool. I wanted to do that for the ladies, but the idea was vetoed.

The day of the wedding itself is indescribably exciting. If your friends enjoy good beverages, you might want to be involved in the selection even though it’s traditionally the role of the groom’s side. You’ll be preoccupied at the Chuppah, so you might want to ask a friend to take some snaps of the ceremony, so you can relive the event before the photographer’s proofs arrive.

The 25-30 minute first dance usually begins (in the New York area), 3 hours after the beginning of Kabbolas HaPanim (aka the shmorg), and is one the centerpieces of the wedding, so you’ll want to make the most of it. After the initial dancing with the chosson, close family and Rebbeim, the breakaway Shul dance circle will form. Most of your friends will want to share a short dance with you, but most won’t initiate it, so reach for their hand and pull them into the center. Try to make each dance short, so that you can include as many people as possible. Pace yourself, because if you’re not in shape, 25 minutes of fast dancing can take it’s toll.

You should be aware that most of your Shul friends will leave after the meal and not stay for the second dance, which is meant for the friends of the Chosson and Kallah. It’s an amazing night, so enjoy and share the joy.