Month: January 2019

Appreciation of Our Wonderful Shul Choices

I was out of town for Shabbos twice in the last two months and it was a great experience. Out of town Shuls are very friendly. Out of towners are less judgmental and more accepting of a wider range of observance. Out of towners really appreciate their shuls and their fellow members. In addition, being away brought me to a greater recognition and appreciation of some aspects of the Shuls in my larger neighborhood.

The first recognition is place. Since there are many Shuls in larger neighborhoods, you are more likely to find one near your house. Many people in my neighborhood have a 1-3 minute walk to their nearest Shul.

The second recognition is time. There are many different times available for Shacharis, Mincha, and Maariv. This greatly increases your opportunities to daven with a minyan. Many people in my neighborhood rarely miss davening with a minyan.

The third recognition is speed. We daven at different paces. It’s nice to be able to find a minyan that fits your speed. When you’re not rushing, you have a better chance of having some kavanna. And if you have a need for some speed, you can find that too.

One of the purposes of prayer is recognizing and appreciating the good that Hashem provides. How appropriate it is to recognize and thank Hashem for our wonderful Shul choices.

Judaism’s Little Secret – It’s Hard to Pray

The Secret
A big issue, when it comes to Shuls and Jews, is that davening is very difficult. This is not pointed out very often from the pulpit, possibly because it would discourage people from making the necessary efforts to improve.

Why is Davening Difficult
One of the reasons that prayer is difficult is because it is very complex. In Shacharis, the morning prayer service, there are five distinct parts 1) brachos and korbonos, 2) Pesukei D’Zimrei (songs of praise) 3) Shema and its Berachos, 4) Shemoneh Esrai, 5) End of service. Each part requires different applications of our emotional, intellectual and spiritual components. Davening is also difficult because the act of speaking to G-d is a very abstract process. The third major difficulty is keeping focused and maintaining focus, a problem whose existence is evident from the halacha for hundreds of years. This has certainly become worse over the years as our world has become a more distracted place.

Bad Habits are Hard to Break
People learn to daven very early in life when they don’t have the intellectual maturity to understand its depths. As a result the “Shake and Fake” process, as the kids sometimes call it, gets baked into a potentially lifelong bad habit of going through the motions. Years of Shul going in the early years can also effect our approach to davening.

The Problem for Shuls
As we’ve pointed out in previous posts, one of the primary purposes of gathering together at Shul is to pray. If people are not focused on the prayer process, then the Shul will not be aligned around the goal of providing a great prayer environment. The result of this misalignment leads to problems like talking, speed of davening and structure of the prayer service, which we’ve discussed. In non-Observant Shuls, the disconnect from prayer has been described as a leading cause of the Decline of the Great American Non-Orthodox Synogogue.

What We Can We Do
The first step is to educate people to the fact that almost everyone has trouble with concentration during davening, but with effort we can improve over time. Providing shiurim and starting vaadim (groups working on improving) is a great step in the right direction. Sharing experiences that worked among members can encourage the attitude that if my neighbor has improved, then so can I. From a Shul Politics perspective it’s important to keep “providing a great place to daven” high on the Shul’s agenda even if we’re not at the level we would like to be regarding prayer.

Appreciating the Quirks of Shul Members

Shuls Are About The People
Shuls are more than a place to pray. They aren’t just minyan factories churning out thrice daily prayer services. Shuls are communities, social groups, places for us to make deep and lasting friendships. Shuls, at their heart, are about the people.

People Have Their Quirks
You don’t have to be an Myers-Briggs expert to know that people have different personality types. Beyond the types, people have flaws and idiosyncrasies. And as much as we often wish that people would behave more like us, we know deep down that a planet full of me-clones would be boring at best, and probably closer to intolerable.

Look For The Strengths
Even if we grant that differences in people make the world a more interesting place, what do we do about the fact that people can be downright annoying? One path is to focus on people’s strengths. Everybody has them, and the more you look for them, the easier it is to find them. It’s a talent that’s worth developing and it will make you a better spouse, parent and friend. Find the strengths and share your findings with others.

Love The Quirks
Finding strengths is doable, but the quirks are a challenge. Personality quirks are hard enough to appreciate, and serious character weaknesses are often intolerable. The key to loving the quirks is appreciating that they are the keys to our lives. We have to overcome them, and often try to change them and it’s difficult, but it’s what we’re here for.

Resisting the Tyranny of the Majority
In Shuls, the membership machine is often looking to eliminate quirky behavior for the benefit of the Shul. It often is stated in the form of “Why should we all suffer, just because Joe is….”. We sometimes must mute bad behavior, but in most cases, the behavior is tolerable and we should just grin and bear it and appreciate the person’s challenges. In Shuls, we need to focus on the individual, not on the collective, it may be counter-intuitive, but it’s the right thing to do.

Summary
Shuls are about the people and we all have our quirks. Tolerating, accepting and appreciating the quirks of others makes you a better person and makes your Shul a better place.

Shul Security Tips

There was a good article in the Forward containing some Shul Security Tips. Here is a link to the article. Here are the tips.

1) Strike the balance between preparedness and paranoia.

2) Use technology where it’s prudent.

3) Develop a synagogue security plan.

4) Take advantage of the physical security you already have.

5) Install video surveillance.

6) Design a plan to cooperate with local law enforcement.

7) Train synagogue leaders about security.

8) Engage the community while leaving most of the responsibility on the staff.

9) Apply for a security site visit.

10) Consider active shooter training programs.

11) Assign patrolling staff.

The Darkness Reveals the Light

It was a typical Friday morning. I stopped by Wassermans supermarket at about 8:30 am to pick up a few things for Shabbos. I didn’t paying enough attention to the Con Ed truck and the police cars parked at a nearby Shul.

I went home at about 9:30 and my son-in-law and grandson knocked on the door and proceeded to tell me about the fire coming out of the manhole right near our Shul. Our Shul also houses the Gan that my grandson attends. My son-in-law explained that a fire travelled from a manhole near the Con Ed truck to our Shul. All the children from the Gan were evacuated in a safe and orderly fashion as the Shul lost all power.

At about 10:15 I got a call requesting that an email go out to our members explaining the situation. We we’re not going to get power back until at least Shabbos. Some building committee members and the Rabbi laid out a plan of action. Here is the email:
—————————————————————-
There is currently a power outage in the Shul due to an Underground Fire. Con Edison is not sure exactly when power will be restored.

– The Gan classes have been dismissed.
– The 12:25 Early Mincha today is cancelled.
– We hope to have emergency lighting in the Men’s section for Mincha/Maariv tonight.
– There will be no Youth Groups tomorrow.
– We are planning on having Shacharis tomorrow, possibly with only natural light.
– We will be sending an update later (I”YH) regarding the scheduled Melava Malka and the MS Learning.

Please say a Kapitel Tehillim (121, 130) for the continued protection of the Shul and its inhabitants.
—————————————————————-

A few trips were made to Home Depot by our call-to-duty members. Shabbos Services under battery operated lights was a nice experience. The Rav’s Friday night Dvar halacha was appropriately about the permissibility to move the battery operated lights and to have a non-jew remove the batteries after services.

Shacharis and Mussaf under natural lights went well and we were even able to have the Hashkama minyan in the basement Social Hall with the assist of some battery operated lights. When we got back for Mincha the lights were restored and we had Shalosh Seudos in the Social Hall and the full Moatzae Shabbos schedule took place in the Shul.

There were many things to be thankful for as a result of this incident:
1) We were able to have Full Shabbos Services without any electricity for most of Shabbos.
2) We have a number of members, and our Rabbi, who are ready and willing to do whatever is necessary to insure the proper functioning of the Shul.
3) The Shul was built with much natural light which was of great avail for Shabbos day services.
4) Con Edison works quite hard in our five boroughs to restore power in emergency situations.

It’s easy to take electricity and the functioning of Shul Service for granted. Sometimes Hashem throws a curve ball so we can appreciate everything that goes into making davening happen day in and day out.